🎄 "So you're here for the story?"
Elf (2003). Welcome to the 21st (and Christmas) edition of The Reel!
The Reel is a biweekly blog reviewing film and TV, with a humorous slant you may find delightful or annoying.
Estimated reading time: 5m 58s.
It was Christmas Eve’s Eve, baaabe!
As the year grows to a close, the holiday film has long since made its return.
What’s my favourite Christmas film?
I’m glad you asked!
Of course, there’s Home Alone:
I’ve a soft spot for Elf:
And then there’s the blockbusters that have absolutely no relevance to Christmas, but always pop up on TV in the last two weeks of December:
For me, however, there can be only one.
It’s not a tale of love, or loss, or adventure, or destiny.
It doesn’t feature American, or British, or Irish actors.
It’s not a romance, or a drama, or even a comedy.
It is all of the above.
It’s Love Actually:
Several films of decent to terrible quality are reviewed in this edition of The Reel. However, if you’re looking for one film to enjoy this festive season, it has to be that 2003 ensemble classic.
I will be watching it for the 36th time, and I will be crying at Emma Thompson’s Joni Mitchell scene for the 37th (once I cried during and two hours after said scene).
Time for some reviews!
This week: Bad moms, worse doppelgängers, and a healthy dose of Xmas cheer.
❄️ A tale of two cities.
The Holiday (2006), film, directed by Nancy Meyers.
Ah, to be jetting off abroad for a holiday this Christmas.
Even if that meant engaging in an informal agreement to exchange homes with a stranger on the internet, I would jump at the opportunity.
Though I’m not sure who exactly would trade with my cramped flat in Rathmines (any exotically-located readers, hit me up).
That’s just what Amanda (Cameron Diaz) and Iris (Kate Winslet) decide to do when meeting on a home exchange website — temporarily switch their respective homes in L.A. and rural England and get away for the holidays.
As implausible as it is that this would go down smoothly, it is even more implausible that both women would find true love at their new destinations.
But who watches Christmas films for realism?
The love interests come in the form of Iris’ brother Graham (Jude Law) for Amanda, and film composer Miles (Jack Black) for dear Iris.
Jude Law’s good looks are not accompanied by the sneer that marks so many of his more villainous performances — simply a pleasant face for a pleasant man.
Jack Black, while somewhat out of place as the rom-com leading man, is just as charming (and, crucially to me as a rival straight male, non-threateningly attractive).
With bubbly and energetic performances from the leading ladies, The Holiday is a film that will warm your soul in this cold winter
Look out for: Can we say meta-referential Hollywood cynicism? It is interesting that Iris’ primary companions in L.A. are a film composer and Golden Age Hollywood screenwriter. Her final break-up with toxic flame Jasper is a satisfactory treat.
If you liked this: You simply must check out this tiny independent film from the early noughties, about a goofy head of state who falls for his lovable assistant. It’s called Love Actually.
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐
🤶 “Bad mom!! Get down from there right now!!”
A Bad Moms Christmas (2017), film, directed by Jon Lucas & Scott Moore.
The Bad Moms are back!
Characterised not by absence or toxic influence, but by how crrraaaazzy they are.
And this time at Christmas!
I have nothing against these moms, or indeed moms in general. I am a big fan of my own…
… and an even bigger fan of my schoolfriend Stephen’s. 😉
(Mary, I am forever yours.)
With these moms, however, their goal over 104 minutes is to make us laugh. That goal was rarely achieved.
Mila Kunis leads a stellar bunch of matriarchal performers, all of whom do their utmost with the extremely weak material provided.
We run the gamut of derivative, low-brow humour clichés:
Dodgeball fight ✅
Sexual innuendos from older characters ✅
Hair-waxing scene ✅
Male stripper hilarity (complete with some good old-fashioned fat-shaming) ✅
If done well, these can be enjoyable. If done poorly, as they are here, it’s a long, tiresome journey indeed.
Not the worst film this week, but not far off.
Look out for: Cheryl Hines (of Curb Your Enthusiasm fame) is a shining light as Kristen Bells’ overbearing mother Sandy. This therapy scene with her daughter is a highlight.
If you liked this: You will absolutely love this quirky foreign film about one man’s journey to the United States to find love, and the hilarious mishaps he has along the way. I believe it’s called Love Actually.
Rating: ⭐⭐
⏩ Quickies
Short and snappy reviews for a short and snappy time:
Fred Claus (2007, film, dir. David Dobkin): ⭐⭐
Vince Vaughan is fine here, if you like that fast-talking, no-change-in-facial-expression humour of his. Paul Giamatti is terribly miscast as Santa Claus. And there’s also Kevin Spacey… I don’t think anyone would complain if we tossed this one out with the wrapping paper.
Nativity! (2009, film, dir. Debbie Isitt): ⭐⭐⭐
Whimsy, thy name is Nativity!! A delightful little film starring Martin Freeman as a beleaguered primary school teacher putting on a nativity play, which gets out of hand. As one might expect, the (literal) stars of the show are the child actors, whose dialogue is partially improvised.
The Princess Switch: Switched Again (2020, film, dir. Mike Rohl): ⭐
Shitty, thy name is The Princess Switch: Switched Again! How to follow up a film where two characters meet and find out that they’re identical? Introduce a third such character! If you thought the accents in the Wild Mountain Thyme trailer were bad, wait until you hear Vanessa Hudgens doing… whatever it is she’s trying to do here.
📃 Quote of the Week(s)
“Iris, if you were a melody... I used only the good notes.”
In The Holiday, Jack Black as Miles justifies his left field casting with this instant rom-com classic.
📅 Previously, in pop culture…
Landmark events from the last two weeks in film and TV histoire:
Dec 15 - Walt Disney dies of lung cancer in 1966, aged 65.
Dec 15 - Gone With the Wind premieres in Atlanta in 1939. Unadjusted for inflation, it is the highest-grossing film of all time.
Above (The Simpsons): I’m ashamed to say that 80% of my knowledge of Gone With The Wind comes from this one clip.
Dec 17 - In 2014, Sony Pictures cancels the release of Seth Rogen and James Franco’s political satire The Interview, after a cyber attack on the studio.
Dec 17 - In 2018 a US poacher is sentenced to watch the film Bambi repeatedly during a year in prison, as punishment for killing hundreds of deer in Missouri.
✅ Th-th-that’s all, folks.
And that brings one full year of The Reel to a close!
Thank you very, very much for reading.
If you have shared this blog at some point this year, I am even more grateful. 🥰
If you’d like to do so now, you can find all the relevant links by clicking the button here:
The Reel will be back in January, with a few pleasant surprises in store for 2021.
Thanks again, and a merry, merry Christmas to all!
xxx
Previous Reels:
🎬 Nov 25 - The Crown, Bewitched, Saving Mr. Banks.
🎬 Oct 28 - Scream, The Witches, Let The Right One In, Hubie Halloween.
🎬 Oct 14 - Peppermint, One Cut Of The Dead, Emily in Paris.
You can find a catalogue of all previous editions of The Reel here.