🎬 You saved the day again, Woody.
You're my favourite deputy. Welcome back to The Reel!
Estimated reading time: 5 mins 45 seconds.
Another two weeks gone, another 14 days of house-bound isolation!
We’re all finding new ways to spend our time. Fitness challenges, baking sourdough loaves, informal cannibalism (just me?).
Some of us, however, are increasing certain app activity. This simply must be addressed.
The People vs. Mum: Dubious “Funny Clips” Being Sent Into The Family WhatsApp Group.
Your Honour, I would like to present to the court Exhibits A through E:
Take care to note the date on each of these screenshots: 28 March 2020.
On every one.
28 March 2020.
Yes, your Honour, these were all sent into the Gogarty family Whatsapp group on the same day.
There are two important factors to note here:
There was no response from any of the victims at any point.
Several of these clips had laugh tracks.
Where did the accused find the videos in question? Well, your Honour, I have reason to believe that she is not the only offender here.
There is a national network of perpetrators, mostly women over 50 years old, who appear to be aiding and abetting one another in the excessive propagation of sub-par “viral” clips over WhatsApp.
I seek the death penalty.
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, I leave this in your capable hands.
This week: Sociopaths, spies, and suddenly it all makes sense.
🐻 Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.
Grizzly Man (2005), film, directed by Werner Herzog.
I can safely say I have never seen anything like this before.
Part documentary, part ode to cinema, and part old-school vlog by a deeply strange man, Grizzly Man is an extended profile of American grizzly bear fanatic, Timothy Treadwell.
Directed by Werner Herzog (recently on our screens as The Client in The Mandalorian), it’s made clear from the off that Treadwell loses his life in a bear attack. What follows is a deep dive (mostly through his own self-shot footage) into the life of a man who spent his summers “protecting” wild bears in Alaska.
Herzog is clearly fascinated by not only Treadwell, but the way he captures his footage, and its unintended beauty. Herzog’s narration is as much a meditation on nature and filmmaking as it is an analysis of Treadwell himself.
He is an incredibly unique, and troubled, subject. We witness first-hand the increasing paranoia and delusion that plagues him during his extended stints in the wild.
ABOVE: A celebrity in his own right, Treadwell featured on David Letterman at the height of his fame.
His manner is childlike at times, and Grizzly Man isn’t without its moments of levity. But it’s a film the defines the term “haunting.”
You won’t have an experience quite like it. Or your non-existent money back!
Look out for: Every piece Herzog’s narration is a golden insight from a master filmmaker. Treadwell is not the only strange character in this story - keep an eye out for a particularly peculiar coroner.
If you liked this: Is there anything even remotely like this? Tiger King? I doubt it. Treadwell’s descent into near-madness is like something from Edgar Allen Poe. The Black Cat, perhaps?
Rating: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
👮 The name’s Wahlberg. Detective Wahlberg.
Spenser Confidential (2020), film, directed by Peter Berg.
Mark Wahlberg has somehow bludgeoned his way to being a top-billing, bonafide blockbuster superstar, despite being in almost exclusively bad films.
Here is his filmography since 2010, of which I have (unfortunately) seen over 70%. For your convenience, I have highlighted in red the films that are good:
He’s a good actor who’s been in a few great films (namely Boogie Nights and The Departed) but his recent history is appalling.
I’m afraid to say that Spenser Confidential is no different.
ABOVE: Little and large - Mark Wahlberg and the walking fridge that is Winston Duke.
This is the fifth collaboration between Wahlberg and director Peter Berg. Someone needs to tell them to start seeing other people.
This fails in everything it tries to be. Action? Lacklustre. Comedy? Might as well not exist. Mystery? Shudderingly unremarkable. It’s takes about 45 minutes to set up a story and characters that could be done in 20. A much more entertaining 20, at that.
ABOVE: Post Malone as a worryingly convincing Neo-Nazi. Is that his own hair, tattoos... and clothes?
There’s a foot chase scene about a third of the way through that encapsulates the whole film: boring, unfunny, and much too long.
Spend 111 minutes on YouTube instead.
Look out for: Posty is admirable as incarcerated neo-Nazi Squeeb. Visually, he already looks the part. Was this a good choice for his first screen role? Maybe not.
If you liked this: The best private detective stories in any medium are the classics by Raymond Chandler. Read The Big Sleep - short and more electric than most novellas today despite being published 80 years ago.
Rating: ⭐⭐
⏩ Quickies
Short and snappy reviews for a short and snappy time:
Zodiac (2007, film, dir. David Fincher): ⭐⭐⭐⭐
King of the creepy thriller, Fincher does it again with this account of the eponymous serial killer in 1970s California. The Zodiac killer, it’s well documented, was never caught. I’m pretty sure my dad did his J1 in San Diego, haha Dad imagine if you were oh my god it’s him he’s got a kni-
ABOVE (Zodiac): Before his 69 Iron Man appearances, this was one of many quirky Robert Downey Jr. roles.
Body of Lies (2008, film, dir. Ridley Scott): ⭐⭐⭐
The antithesis to Wahlberg, Leonardo DiCaprio’s filmography since The Beach in 2000 is outrageously good. Body of Lies is one of the few missteps: not terrible, but not up to his lofty standards.
ABOVE (Salt): Blondes have more fun/are more conspicuous - Angie pulls a Bourne.
Salt: (2010, film, dir. Phiilip Noyce): ⭐⭐⭐
Angelina Jolie as an American spy. No, wait, a Russian spy. No, wait, an American spy. No, wait… a Russian spy? Wow, this is confusing. Thank God I didn’t become a spy! Unlike my dad. Haha Dad imagine if you were an oh my god he’s got a gun someone hel-
📃 Quote of the Week(s)
Treadwell: “This is a bumblebee who expired as it was working at doing the pollen thing on this Alaskan fireweed. And it just is... Just has really touched me to no end. It was doing its duty, it was flying around. Working busy as a bee, and it died right there. It's beautiful, it's sad, it's tragic. I love that bee.”
(pause)
Treadwell: “Well, the bee moved.”
Timothy Treadwell mistakenly mourns a sleeping bee in Grizzly Man.
📅 Previously, in pop culture…
Landmark events from the last two weeks in film & TV histoire:
Mar 20 - John Carter records one of the largest losses in cinema history in 2012, with a $200 million dollar write down.
Mar 23 - Titanic wins 11 Oscars in 1997, a joint record to this day.
ABOVE (Titanic): “Finally, after all these years, the world is mine! I mean.. I’m king of the world!”
Mar 25 - Jennifer Aniston files for divorce from Brad Pitt in 2005 😔 But are they getting back together? 😮 Now that would be telling! 😉
Mar 2 - The OG comedy classic Some Like It Hot is released in 1959.
✅ Th-th-that’s all, folks.
Thank you very much for reading another edition of The Reel!
If you’re looking for some slightly different entertainment this week, the National Theatre are streaming a classic play for free on YouTube every Thursday. It starts tonight at 7pm with James Corden’s Tony-winning performance in One Man, Two Guvnors (hat-tip to queen thespian Marie Davis for this one).
I also recently rediscovered one of my all time favourite YouTube clips. This Feed the World-esque skit & song by Flight of the Conchords for Red Nose Day:
Maybe the best 14 minutes you’ll spend all week.
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To the many who have already put screenshots in Instagram stories, I am very grateful 🙏
You can find me on Instagram, LinkedIn and you can reply directly to this email 🤙
Thanks again, and I’ll see you in two weeks!
xxx
Previous Reels:
🎬 Mar 18 - Love is Blind, Drive to Survive, A Quiet Place.