Estimated reading time: 6m 22s.
An extremely bounteous and wonderful New Year from all of us (one person) at The Reel!
You may have entirely missed the Golden Globes taking place last week. Youâd be forgiven for such, as the ceremony was not, in fact, televised.
The yearâs big winner was Netflixâs The Power of the Dog starring Benedict Cumberbatch, set in the Wild West.
Next yearâs big winner? Amazonâs The Hair of the Dog starring Colin Farrell, set in a Spar deli.
Weâve a lot of films to catch up on â time for some reviews!
This week:Â Â Dissatisfying satire, insoluble sci-fi, unstoppable Spielberg, and poker.
âď¸Â Apocalypse Now Soon.
Donât Look Up (2021), film, directed by Adam McKay.
Last time I saw a cast this impressive, my sister had broken her leg in eight places! đ¤Ş
The blinding star wattage of Donât Look Up elevated it to âevent movieâ status in the weeks preceding its release, but ultimately it disappoints.
Adam McKayâs intentions are admirable. A giant comet is heading towards Earth; enter scientists Leo DiCap and Jenny Laz, who must convince a sceptical and self-absorbed world to take action ahead of their impending doom.
Donât Look Up is not particularly bad, but with the cast attached and the meaty concept, the fact that it is not particularly good is a failure in and of itself.
Intertwined with the thinly-veiled climate change allegory are attempted satire at Big Tech, celebrity culture, and naturally enough, American politics & news media.
Maybe McKay should have attempted making a good film first. Bazinga!
Look out for:
McKayâs faux-artsy montage calling card (news clips/obscure stills/movie footage) seems like an attempt at Monty Python-esque cleverness. It didnât work in The Big Short, it didnât work in Vice, and it doesnât work here.
If you liked this:Â Â
Watch this highly amusing story of Jonah Hill and J-Law calling Meryl Streep the GOAT⌠and then feel free to lament even further that these generational talents werenât put to better use.
Rating:Â âââ
đ Which pill makes you forget? Give it to me.
The Matrix Resurrections (2021), film, directed by Lana Wachowski.
Fool on me, for thinking this would be good!
Fool on me, for thinking this would be entertaining!
Fool on me, for thinking this would even be remotely watchable!
The Matrix Resurrections is even more of a disappointment than Donât Look Up, and one of the worse films Iâve seen in the cinema in the last year.
Keanu Reeves is back as cinemaâs most powerful introvert, Neo, but now lives life as a famous video game designer, Thomas Anderson. The fourth instalment of the Matrix franchise is such a departure for the series, it might almost be considered a spin-off.
More meta than Zuckerberg, more self-referential than Zlatan, it is a painful example of a franchise thinking they are being clever, when they really really arenât.
Without spoiling it (in case some of you, against your better judgement, would actually like to watch this), several narrative decisions beggar belief, and are almost worth watching for the cringe.
Not a single redeeming quality.
Look out for:
A truly nauseating sequence where several in-movie characters discuss the merits of the original trilogy and why they were so loved. Itâs like watching a suspicious teacher espousing the virtues of a particular student â inappropriate, uncomfortable, and potentially illegal.
If you liked this:Â Â
To paraphrase Roy Keane: âIf you think this was a good movie⌠Iâm doubtful of you anyway but youâre confirming youâre in cuckooland.â
Ratings:Â Â â
đ All hail Garfield and Zygler.
Tick Tick⌠Boom! (2021), film, directed by Lin-Manuel Miranda.
West Side Story (2021), film, directed by Steven Spielberg.
Ever heard of Jonathan Larson?
Me neither.
Heâs best known for creating the stage musical Rent, which opened after his unfortunate death from undiagnosed heart problems. Andrew Garfield stars as Larson in Tick Tick⌠Boom!, a film musical based on his life, with songs from his titular, lesser-known musical.
Garfield is a triumph, deservedly winning plaudits from every corner and scooping up the GG (Golden Globe, will that catch on?) for Best Actor / Musical or Comedy. Itâs not as moving or as inspiring as it could be, but itâs a competent piece.
Steven Spielberg, on the other hand, delivers a masterclass in musical cinema. The West Side Story reboot is bugginâ fantastic, led by a star-making turn as Maria by Garfieldâs fellow GG winner, Rachel Zegler.
Zegler was just 18 at the time of filming. Ariana DeBose as Anita is another superb talent whose profile will no doubt be elevated by an electrifying performance.
I must point out, for perhaps the fourth time in this blog, that I, too, once starred in a production of West Side Story. Granted, it was in the non-singing, non-dancing role of Lieutenant Schrank, and I was 22 at the time, and I have not acted since.
But I see a lot of parallels between myself and Zeglerâs explosion onto the musical theatre scene.
2021âs West Side Story is beautiful to look at, and every bit as tragic and enthralling as the original.
Look out for:
The scene-stealing Anita from the 1961 film, Rita Moreno, returns in the minor role of Valentina, replacing the (fairly banal) character of Doc. Her rendition of âSomewhereâ shows that sheâs still got it 60 years later.
If you liked this:Â Â
Last yearâs In The Heights has a lot of similarities to West Side Story: based in New York, identity and the immigrant experience to the fore, people in their 30s playing teenagers etc. Not as good, but a great watch and some crazy choreography.
Ratings:  Tick, Tick⌠Boom! âââ, West Side Story âââââ
⊠Quickies
Short and snappy reviews for a short and snappy time:
Little Women (2019, film, dir. Greta Gerwig): âââââ
Two five-star reviews in one edition! Iâm a sucker for Saoirse Ronan, and while Iâm not a period drama fan, Little Women is as good as (if not better than) previous Reel favourite Sense & Sensibility. And the women are so little! Itâs really true!
The Killing of a Sacred Deer (2017, film, dir. Yorgos Lanthimos): âââ
Literally what the fuck is this?? Has anyone else seen this? Psychological horror, where the most disturbing thing is the extremely bizarre way every character speaks (not joking, watch it and see). Compelling, disturbing, completely batshit.
The Card Counter (2021, film, dir. Paul Schrader): ââââ
Speaking of batshit, am I the only one who thinks that poker is incredibly, incredibly bad? Like, the whole thing. It is so bad and boring. Normalise poker being shit! And golf, while weâre at it! And make comic books cool!! They canât stop us all!! (Good film though.)
Raising Arizona (1987, film, dir. Joel Coen): âââ
The Coen brothersâ sophomore effort is more confused and chaotic than their later films, but it is undeniably charming. This is despite the fact that Nicholas Cage looks like a slightly sexier Cletus from The Simpsons. Or maybe because of that..?
â Th-th-thatâs all, folks.
Thank you very much for reading!
Apologies for the excessive text dump in this edition â I hope you enjoyed it all the same!
If you did, I would appreciate so much if you could share it. You can do so by clicking the button here:
Or the old screenshot and share in an Insta story is just as welcome and appreciated. â¤ď¸
Thank you very much again, and see you next time!
Gogzibear
xxx
đ Previous Reels:
đŹ Nov 5 - Dune, Ted Lasso, This Way Up, 28 Days Later, The Guilty.
đŹÂ Oct 13 - No Time to Die, The Many Saints of Newark, Stath Lets Flats.
đŹ Feb 10 - Nomadland, Sound of Metal, WandaVision, Babyteeth.
đ Catalogue:
You can find a list of all film review scores (and opening movie lines!) here.
đď¸ Podcast:
Iâve also published 10 episodes of a film review podcast Movies (And A Rap) â you can listen on Spotify here.